The Day I Met My Niece
“Go ahead and hold her,” my sister told me. I responded by giving her a look somehow encompassing shock, fear, sheer terror, and confusion into a single facial expression. Here I was, a junior in high school with a great deal of experience with being nervous in my life, having given speeches in front on my entire school, played in overtime football games, shot free throws to win a game in front of a packed gym, and faced a full count with two outs and the bases loaded in the final inning, but nothing compared to my feeling of sheer terror at being handed my screaming niece.
She had been very premature, being so tiny that she had been able to fit in her Christmas stocking a month before I saw her, and during my seven hour flight to
I was expecting to be eased into this whole “uncle thing” one small step at a time. Maybe get accustomed to my surroundings for a little while, grab something to eat, do my taxes, read a book; anything but having to step into all-out uncle mode right away. I was 100% confident in my inability to be able to hold my niece. However, my sister had other ideas, and, for some strange reason, within minutes of my arrival, thought that the perfect first time for easing me into this unknown territory would be to hand me her hungry, tired, and crying daughter.
Now, here is where I would normally describe how she immediately calmed down when I held her and how she never cried when I held her from that day on, but that would not entirely be the truth. Luckily, I didn’t drop her (nor have I to this day), but she did continue to cry, which I still think is hilarious as her first reaction to seeing me. Though our first meeting did not go exactly as planned, it is only the first chapter in the many great experiences I have had since my niece and nephew were born. She is only five (and a half, as she would tell you), but I have already had some of the best times of my life with her.
The best experience about watching my niece grow up has been watching our family change along with her and to see how important she and her brother, Liam (born two years after Aisling), have become to our lives. From both of our initial nerves, my brother and I have changed into the best uncles in the world (if I do say so), quick to outfit our niece and nephew in Baby Air Jordan’s and Detroit Pistons gear, and even quicker to take any challenge from them to play any of the games of the days. My other sister has even been gracious enough to give Aisling another play partner in her husband Franco, who has instantly been welcomed into the family.
I never could have imagined how much fun being an uncle could be. Once I put aside my nerves, I was able to sit back and watch my niece grow and learn. Six years ago, I never would have guessed the amount of hours spent playing hide-and-seek, re-enacting entire scenes from Christmas plays, or being chased around the house during an intense game of “dragons.” I now can’t picture my life without voicemail messages on my phone with a tiny, British voice on the other end or the many drawings sent on birthdays and holidays and I’m able to share in the joy of first steps, first words, and first days of school.
Being the youngest of my five siblings, I also feel that my relationship with Aisling has allowed me to experience the same joy and feelings that my siblings had as they watched me grow. They were the ones who played with me, who I drew pictures for, and who I chased around the house. They love to tell me stories of how I was a kid and I can feel their pride in knowing the part that they all played in getting me to where I am today. Now, Aisling allows me to return the favor to them in a way and gives me the chance to share the same pride in watching her grow, until it’s her turn to become nervous about meeting her own niece.
2 comments:
D.Kell: My favorite part about your piece is your voice. I really feel like this is "you." Your humor shines through and provides a good window to your personality, I like that. I agree with you in that there seems to be a disconnect between the beginning of your narrative and the end. The beginning does a decent job at setting up who you are before Aisling arrives... your confidence in so many arenas (outside of "unclehood"). I think that after you describe the birth of Aisling you need to get specific on YOU. I get the impression that you are steering towards how your family dynamic changed, but I want to know about why it made a difference for you. There is obviously a reason why you chose this topic, and I don't think you make it exactly clear. Think about how you changed/your feelings/your feelings about your family etc. The end of your piece could be more powerful, and have more of a kick, if it focused directly on you.
Hi David,
The red titles on the blue background are screwing with my eyes. How do you do it?
I think the first three paragraphs all present good points of entry into your piece. In the first graph, you talk about past nerves you've felt -- the sports nerves. If you choose to enter the story here, then what was so different about this nervous experience? Did you learn anything from the classic full-count scenario that helped you deal with your niece? Or do sports not prepare people for nerves off the pitch?
Let me back-track for a moment. I see two themes emerging around your niece / family. One is how nervous you were to be an uncle as a high school junior? The other is how much fun it was to watch a family grow. If there is a way to merge the two, go for it, but I think there is a good story in each. My gut feeling is to go with the first one, Uncle at age 16 (or so), sort of like the Susan Orlean piece, "American man, age 10," but about you.
Back on track, and let's explore the Uncle at 16 angle. So the first graph is the sports nerves point of entry. In the second graph, you set up the little life in my hand entry point. You sort of get into that a little bit later in the piece when you talk about you and your brother outfitting your niece in Baby Air Jordans and Piston's gear, only an uncle's love. I'm not sure if there is much room here unless you really felt like there was a responsibility to mold this new life.
I think the most mileage comes out of the third graph, the "holy shit, I'm an uncle and I can't finish a crossword puzzle yet," point of entry. This one can encompass all three previous topics. What does it mean to be an uncle? What did you think it meant -- taxes, book-reading, a tweed jacket and pipe? What did it end up meaning?
There should be room to explore here. You entered uncle-hood at such a young age that you can no look back on what you feared and what became a reality.
Each one of these angles presents a concise way to approach the story. I think it is a story about how someone changed you, and that someone happened to be a niece that fits in a Christmas stocking (that image is awesome, develop it).
The real story lies between these two sentences, "My other sister has even been gracious enough to give Aisling another play partner in her husband Franco, who has instantly been welcomed into the family." and, "I never could have imagined how much fun being an uncle could be."
It's when you move from being scared to being an uncle.
I hope this has helped focus the story a bit more for you. There is a lot of good work here; it just needs a starting point. Great imaginary, Christmas stocking, baby in b-ball gear, sports nerves. I think you can find a real strength in developing this.
Let me know if you have any other questions. This is my favorite part of the writing process.
Aaron (http://specialaups.blogspot.com)
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